DAN to Skin Diver: GET THAT SLUT OFF MY MAGAZINE!Powered by CDNN - CYBER DIVER News Network
by A. W. BILLINGS & FREEMAN WASHINGTONThe following editorial is reprinted by permission of IN-DEPTH magazine | DAN's ousted CEO Pete Bennett is really hot! |
It takes a lot to boil some people's blood, but even DAN founder, Pete Bennett, can get seriously bent out of shape when pushed past his no complaint limits.Since striking his sweetheart marketing deal with Skin Diver Magazine, we haven't heard a peep from Bennett - let alone a discouraging word - regarding anything the industry wants to push, no matter how dangerous. Divers dying in droves from "extreme diving experiences" that take them to 200 ft+ on air? Hey dude, extreme diving is extremely risky! Divers being carried off with the nervous system of an avocado because they didn't quite get all the details right in their mixed-gas specialty course? Hey, diving is like driving a car. You can't eliminate all the risks! Another fourteen novice cave divers donated to Florida's aquifer? Hey, sh*t happens even when you're doing it right! A few more divers returning from "interactive diving" with one less appendage to interact with? Hey, if you want to become an "Ambassador", you better be ready to pay the price! But the latest issue of Diver Alert wedded to a Skin Diver cover showing a buxom teen-age bikini model humping a bowsprit as if she were auditioning for a spread in Hustler magazine? Now that's going too far! Far enough even to wake up old Pete Bennett from his daydreams of lining his personal pockets with income generated by not-so-savvy bronze, silver, gold, platinum and diamond sponsors galore. "What are you trying to pull on us Hornsby? We have family values here at DAN!" Either Skin Diver is actually published by some junior high school kids or the people who cook up these silly stunts are grownups who stopped developing emotionally and intellectually at the age of 14. |
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So dirty old Bennett, caught with his pants down scrutinizing the nymphetic copy of Alert Diver/Skin Diver, rushed to cover himself up with a DAN tag (now we know what those cute little plastic things are for) and issued a personal and very public apology for the offense to DAN members: "...we too found the cover to be in very bad taste and decided this cannot be allowed to continue…We apologize for the problems this has created." | Liberace back from the dead? No, it's Skin Diver editor Al Hornsby showing off his new tatoo! (but does he have a tongue pierce?) |
Publisher Al Hornsby (intimate friends call him 'Horny') and Editor Ty (shark feeding is better than sex) Sawyer don't see what the fuss is all about. "Hell, Al, all this over some T & A on the cover? We're in the entertainment business for crying out loud. Who the hell does Bennett think he is trying to take the skin out of Skin Diver?"According to the Skin Diver maestros, this was not a new direction Skin Diver was taking - it was simply an attempt to compete with other magazines on the newsstand. Like Hustler, Playboy, and Dive Nympho. Actually, we don't really think it was just the picture that caused the problem. No, it was the OH SO CLEVER AND SUBTLE copy writing that put Hornsby and Sawyer in DAN's recompression chamber to get little Miss Bubbles out of their heads. "Neoprene never felt so good?" Duh I get it Ty! "Indulge yourself?" But is she of legal age Al? ARE YOU OF LEGAL AGE AL? "Dive sluts, make that, dive suits galore?" Cute! AND PUZZLING. Either Skin Diver is actually published by some junior high school kids, or the people who cook up these silly stunts are grownups who stopped developing emotionally and intellectually at the age of 14. You decide. © IN-DEPTH SCUBA DIVING MAGAZINEComments? Go to SCUBA FORUMS Editor's Note: Several months after CDNN published this editorial, Skin Diver went out of business. After Skin Diver went under, PADI hired both Al Hornsby (marketing department) and Ty Sawyer (Sport Diver, PADI's marketing rag). SCUBA FORUMDISCUSS THIS TOPIC - Dive in and have your say at Scuba ForumCDNN Related NewsDeep Trouble: Peter Bennett Goes DownThe Peter (Bennett) Principle: Tell 'em I Ain't Dirty or I'm Gonna Sue Your Ass | 
